Schizophrenia is a broken spirit

The following post is a part of our “Tell Your Story” category, where our readers submit their stories about their contact with the mental health system.

This was originally a submission in our forum by lonewolf, before we changed to the new submission format:

lonewolf

Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: March 22, 2012, 12:24

My younger brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia about 8 years ago. Since then, my mother and father have been so immensely sad watching my brother not be able to hold down a job, talk to himself, laugh to himself, pace around the backyard of my parents home, and not have a an adult life with adult responsibilities.I never accepted that diagnosis for him. I refused to believe that he had a chemical imbalance without PROOF of a chemical imbalance. Human beings are capable of all kinds of behavior. Just because a behavior doesn’t fit in with this particular culture, at this particular point in time, doesn’t mean that the person is suffering from an illness. Furthermore, most people suffering from an illness WANT to get better. I never felt Joe wanted to get better. I could see it in his eyes that he discovered a loophole, a way out. A way to get disability checks, sympathy from my parents, etc. Everyone and the system was reinforcing his behavior.Since Joe is my brother, only 2.5 years younger than me, I feel I know him pretty well. I know that he’s sensitive and shy and would get embarrassed. I also know that some of his life skills aren’t the best (neither were mine when I was a young adult but I kept thrashing forward). Joe went to school after high school and graduated from DeVry with an electronics degree. At around the age of 23-24, he got a job at FedEx as an IT support person. After a few incidents at work where he didn’t have a solution to a problem right away, he got embarrassed and quit. Instead of telling the person with the computer issue, “hold on, let me go ask someone else”, or go and google an answer, or simply state that he is not sure but will spend a few hours or days figuring it out. He instead came home and started crying to my parents that he doesn’t feel “normal”. I knew that life was tough. People take for granted how tough life is. I knew what he was going through. He needed to be told that he has the skills to do good at that job. He needed to be encouraged to go back out there the next day. Instead my parents took that too mean that perhaps he had some weakness, or problem. Perhaps he was depressed? They weren’t sure so from that moment on, he was set off on a journey of phsychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, rehab, detox, mental hospitals, prison, currently Joe roaming the streets asking people for money.It was great for Joe. For the most part he could sit at home, smoke cigarettes all day, which my parents would by for him. I was told to speak gently to Joe since he was “under a lot of stress”. Joe knew he had my parents fooled and that they would now allow him to sit at home and do nothing. But his little plan has backfired on him. He has stopped evolving and has therefore lost his friends, is not capable of talking to women, has no money, etc. And is now much unhappier than he ever would have been if he simply plowed through life’s challenges on his own.

It’s sad watching him deteriorate like this. But I firmly believe that what he is suffering from is a broken spirit, not a chemical imbalance. He needs to be in a place where he is not allowed to smoke, drink alcohol, or smoke grass. He needs discipline and routine. He needs an environment where he is rewarded for good behavior and punished for bad behavior. He needs to be exercising regularly, eating nutritious foods, going to sleep and waking up at regular hours, and someone needs to work with him to slowly build up life skills and confidence.

Dr. Hickey, thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart, for having the courage to speak the truth about this kind of behavior. Everything you write makes complete sense. You write with compassion and caring and love. You have given me so much comfort and dispelled the mysteries around schizophrenia. I have read your essay “Schizophrenia is not an Illness” many times and continue to read it. It is so beautifully and clearly written. With wisdom and truth. In a world where we are being told so many different things and being manipulated and lied to for others gain. I wish you and your family and everything you touch, only the best. You are an incredible human being and deserve the highest honors for humanity.

Phil

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: March 25, 2012, 20:31

Lonewolf,What you write rings so true and is very similar to the history of almost everyone who carries this so-called diagnosis. The establishment position is that individuals like your brother have a brain illness that mysteriously manifests itself around age 21 or 22. My position, of course, is that this is a difficult time of life, and people who lack the necessary skills (meaning especially social skills) can end up on the rocks. What they need is encouragement, coaching, etc… But instead they get major tranquilizers with all the nasty side effects.In describing your own response to early adulthood, you say that you “kept thrashing forward,” which strikes me as very descriptive. I suppose in a way that’s what we all do/did at that stage.Thanks for coming in.

Guest

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: April 24, 2012, 13:02

Thanks. Another interesting observation is how strongly my mother (father passed away 2 years ago) defends the schizophrenia label. If my brother had an actual physical illness which was causing him great physical pain, I’m sure that he and my mother would try ANYTHING and listen to ANYONE that might have a solution. They vehemently dismiss the fact that schizophrenia may not be real. Rather than owning up to the fact that maybe my mother hasn’t been the best mother and that my brother underestimated how difficult life is. It’s easier to explain their failures with the “brain illness” explanation. Rather than they didn’t work hard enough. Reading some of the comments in the “Depression is not an Illness” post, I see the same attitude from a lot of the people that commented.
Everyone I’ve ever met that is on anti-depressants (only about a dozen people or so through my life – i’m not a doctor) has this attitude of defending their depression. They claim to do everything right: sleep enough, eat right, exercise, etc. etc. But from what I can tell they do none of these things. And I think its due to the fact that they lack the skill of self critical appraisal. Dr. you mention this skill in many of your posts.
They don’t seem to have an open-mindedness as to what may be troubling them and how to get around it. They put up great resistance to trying anything new or different. They don’t seem to have a “solution-oriented” attitude. It’s very frustrating to be around.

Phil

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: April 29, 2012, 13:50

Guest,Thanks for coming back.I agree. People defend the broken brain theories with the same irrational vehemence with which many people profess religious tenets or other deeply-held convictions.I also agree with you that there is a fierce resistance within our culture to saying the truly magic words: “I’m sorry; I messed up; what do I need to do to put things right.” We place so much emphasis on success, especially in high school, that we leave very little elbow room for the hapless individuals who “crash and burn.” I think the important thing is not to back people into a corner, but rather to leave them room to acknowledge an error gracefully and even ask for help in remedying matters.

Once again, thanks for an interesting comment. Once you start seeing this stuff, you see it in so many places.

Subscriber

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: November 15, 2012, 05:42

I have Very Same Actually 100% Similar Problem Like “lonewolf” My brother has also “Schizophrenia”.Doctor I just wana ask One Simple Question, Do these schizophrenic Patient Ever Get Better? Do they ever get on their feets (Doing Work, maintaining Relationships etc)
Me and my parents are actually living in hell when ever we see him. This is very tough for us.And i like what “lonewolf” said that these Patients need to be controlled by some means.

Phil

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: November 24, 2012, 10:04

Subscriber,Thanks for coming in. The simple answer to your question is: yes, but not very often. In former times I believe the chances of recovery were better. But the major tranquilizers used to “treat” these problems today cause problems themselves. I’m not suggesting that your brother should come off the drugs. Some individuals are so out of control that they need a degree of restraint, and the drugs sometimes are the best way to achieve this.My suggestion is that you and your parents talk to a counselor – not to help your brother – but to get some suggestions to help you cope and not to get sucked into his dysfunctionality. It’s very difficult to watch a loved one going down a self-destructive road.Feel free to come back from time to time and let us know how things are going. Perhaps there are other readers who might have some thoughts for you.

Best wishes.

Guest

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: December 8, 2012, 04:46

Phil,Thank You for the Reply, Actually i talked to my brother and asked that why is he talking to himself (I always ask him things like that) and he said that he is also suffering from that some one is talking to him so thats why he is answering them (illucination i think)
Sir it has been a long time that we are trying to cure it by medicines but nothing is happeningNow We Started Drug (Olanzapine) about a month ago, it bring no change.He is also married, we thought that if he get marry he will be little bit better but actually marriage doesn’t bring no change

Now we changed our doctor and the new doctor said that Patient needs Better Environment With some Controls (Control on Smoking, Tobacco).

So We Decided to take him to hospital for 6 months where there are other Schizophrenic Patients in similar situation. We are doing this with the hope that this may bring a little change.

Sir Phil, What do you suggest. Appointment is on Next Monday.

Subscriber

Re: Schizophrenia is a broken spirit on: December 8, 2012, 04:49

Now we changed our doctor and the new doctor said that Patient needs Better Environment With some Controls (Control on Smoking, Tobacco).

So We Decided to take him to hospital for 6 months.
There were r Schizophrenic Patients in similar situation. We are doing this wit hope that this may bring a little change.

Sir Phil, What do you suggest. Appointment is on Next Monday.